Capsule

When I close my eyes and visualise my life, I see a small contained vessel of self. I am separated from the world around me by a thin layer of feelings and idiosyncrasies, awash in an ocean of everyone and everything. Sooner or later though, I hope this capsule will dissolve. I don’t want to be trapped in the same way I always have. I want to be a part of all of it, to experience all of it.

Lately I have found myself pulled away from old hurtful things, broken connections, and lost ideas. I mourn them as I mourn many things, as I drift closer to days of happiness and promise. I wake now everyday and think about what I can create with the time I have. I am writing something meaningful again, finding and growing true friendships, and even someone who I hope could be more than that.

As the capsule dissolves and I slip into the current, I remember the time I spent alone and separate. That memory will remain a part of me, but I will dissolve regardless, and finally become a part of the world.